Gather All resources be4 working on any project...

A new vacuum cleaner salesman knocked on the door on the first house of the street.

A tall lady answered the door.

Before she could speak, the enthusiastic salesman barged into the living room and opened a big black plastic bag and poured all the cow droppings onto the carpet.

"Madam, if I could not clean this up with the use of this new powerful vacuum cleaner, I will EAT all this s...!", exclaimed the eager salesman.

"Do you need chilli sauce or ketchup with that" asked the lady.

The bewildered salesman asked, "Why, madam?"

"We just moved in, & there's no electricity in the house!"

MORAL::::: Gather All resources be4 working on any project...

DON'T EVER BE LATE.

A priest was being honored at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A leading local politician and member of the congregation was chosen to make the presentation and give a little speech at the dinner. He was delayed, so the priest decided to say his own few word while they waited...

"I got my first impression of the parish from the first confession I heard here. I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first person who entered my confessional told me he had stolen a television set and, when questioned by the police, was able to lie his way out of it. He had stolen money from his parents, embezzled from his employer, had an affair with his boss's wife, taken illegal drugs, and gave VD to his sister. I was appalled. But as the days went on I knew that my people were not all like that and I had indeed come to a fine parish full of good loving people."


Just as the priest finished his talk, the politician arrived full of apologies at being late. He immediately began to make the presentation and gave his talk..."I'll never forget the first day our parish priest arrived," said the politician. "In fact, I had the honor of being the first oneto goto him in confession."

MORAL OF THIS STORY: DON'T EVER BE LATE.

Some cool dates this year

Hey was thinking of a few cool calender dates this year and found some really nice ones..

ON JUNE 6 - 2006 & 6 MIN & 6 SEC AFTER 6 AM DAY TIME AND DATE WILL BE
06:06:06:06 06/06/06
HAPPENS ONCE IN 10000 YEARS!!!

Also, on 4th of May 2006 at 1AM, 2Min and 3sec the clock showed...
01:02:03 04/05/06
HAPPENS ONCE IN 10000 YEARS!!!

Isnt that cooool!

Some other cool dates are...
20:06:20:06 20/06/2006

Let me know if you find some more.

Cheers!
Sandesh.

Say the right thing at the right time...

Rohit wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.

Rohit looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love You!"

So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Rohit asks, "Son, what happened last night?" His son says, "Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door". Confused, Rohit asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me? I should expect a big quarrel with her!" His son replies, "Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your clothes n shoes off, you said,

"Lady leave me alone! I'm married!"

Moral >>
Self-induced hangover -- Rs. 2000.00 >>
Broken furniture -- Rs. 20,000.00 >>
Breakfast -- Rs. 100.00 >>
Saying The Right Thing While Drunk - PRICELESS

Where to make an effort?

Ever heard the story of the giant ship engine that failed?

The ship's owners tried one expert after another, but none of them could figure but how to fix the engine. Then they brought in an old man who had been fixing ships since he was a youngster. He carried a large bag of tools with him, and when he arrived, he immediately went to work. He inspected the engine very carefully, top to bottom.

Two of the ship's owners were there, watching this man, hoping he would know what to do. After looking things over, the old man reached into his bag and pulled out a small hammer. He gently tapped something. Instantly, the engine lurched into life. He carefully put his hammer away. The engine was fixed! A week later, the owners received a bill from the old man for ten thousand dollars.

"What?!" the owners exclaimed. "He hardly did anything!"

So they wrote the old man a note saying, "Please send us an itemized bill."

The man sent a bill that read:
Tapping with a hammer ......................... $ 2.00
Knowing where to tap ............................. $ 9998.00

Effort is important, but knowing where to make an effort in your life makes all the difference.